Posts tagged ‘g spot sex toys’

Cactus Sex. (please no Rule #36 examples. I’m a little scared.)

triple vibeNow, I admit that I have a few kinks. I like some weird shit. I do, I admit it. However. Those kinks do not include cactus sex. Despite their decidedly phallic shape, cacti do not turn me on, nor do they get me off. Which explains my reticence to try the Total Ecstasy Triple Stimulator, which looks like a pink jelly… yep, you guessed it. Cactus.

Ever since my love affair with the Paul and Paulina began, I’ve had a soft spot for rabbit-style g spot sex toys. So, when I saw this triple stimulator at my fave sex toy shop, I bought it immediately. It looked so… frightening, like in the sense that it would force an orgasm out of me whether I wanted it to or not.

I bounced and giggled like a schoolgirl on illicit caffeine when the UPS guy brought the box. I’m sure he was wondering why I was so excited about a box marked “Lemon Iced Tea Packets” – gotta love Eden’s discrete shipping. I opened the box and looked in, and my first reaction to seeing the Total Ecstasy in it’s package was whoa. It was freaking huge. Like, seriously, no freaking way was that pink jelly mutant cactus monster gonna fit. In my itty bitty girl parts. I was a little scared. Like, terrified, actually.

But, I conquered my fear in the name of research, and busted open the packaging, and immediately wished I had a gas mask. Holy cow, the stench. I mean, I know jelly toys often don’t smell like violets and yumminess, but this thing reeked of toxic spill laced with cherry cough syrup. It reminded me of the Dip from Roger Rabbit. Ugh. Return it? Maybe. I decided to give it a chance to air out first, on account of the excessive heat when it was shipped. So I washed it with mild soap, dryed it, washed it again, dryed it again, then set it in front of a fan for a day. I washed, rinsed, repeated for two days, until the smell was mostly gone.

I had another moment of doubt, but that was quickly squashed by my hyperactive sex drive. So I grabbed a condom, slid it on my new sex toy, and got to town.

Wow. I mean, wow. It took seconds, seconds before I was gasping in shock at the totally amazing and unexpected dual clitoral and g spot orgasms that had just bitch-slapped my nether regions. I’m not sure what all this stuff about anal orgasms is all about, but I think I may have had one of those too. Needless to say, it took me a few minutes to recover.

I’ve got to say that the design of the Total Ecstasy is pretty good, at least for me. It really wasn’t as big as it looked in the packaging, but it still is kind of a hefty sex toy. The clitoral and anal stimulators are positioned right, and they’re soft enough to easily translate vibration without being overly pokey. The rotation feature leaves a bit to be desired, but as I said, it did not fail to get me off.

So, yeah. After about a week the smell is mostly gone, but that jelly is not really safe. Definitely plan on condoms if you’re gonna try it out. While I can’t whole-heartedly recommend the Total Ecstasy Triple Stimulator, I can definitely say that I won’t be returning mine. How can I forsake a toy that treated me so well? You can check it out here.

June 27, 2009 at 9:49 am 3 comments

If you need an excuse to buy a sex toy…

GSPOTGod knows I don’t. But, hey, I’ll take whatever reason I can get to indulge myself. So, Eden Fantasys is handing out free second day air on all Jimmyjane products. In case you’re unfamiliar, Jimmyjane makes the absolute best sex toys ever. Ever. Like, I want to do things to every toy in their entire line.

So hey, use this as an excuse to pick up an iconic pocket rocket (everyone needs at least one. but, four’s better, cause then you can hide them in sneaky places, like in the back of your car’s glovebox, or behind the computer, or at the bottom of a bag of flour), or a quality rabbit. Orrrrrr…. Really spoil yourself or your girl and pick up the incomparable Form 6. It’s g spot stimulation as art. Smooth, sexy lines make you just wanna slide it somewhere naughty, then wiggle it a little. Ohhh boy. Check out other Jimmyjane stuff here.

So. FREE 2nd day shipping people. You can have your new sex toy under your pillow before you’ve had a chance to explain it’s presence. The code’s JJAIR, enter it at checkout.

June 26, 2009 at 1:09 pm Leave a comment

New Review at the Vibrator G Spot

smart balls1Hooray for new sex toys! I got my shipment from Eden Fantasys yesterday, and holy cow I was giggling like a schoolgirl when I tore that thing open. Got four cool new toys, and first out of the gate (or in, haha, god is it bad to laugh at your own stupid jokes?) were Fun Factory’s Smart Balls. I wanted the honeydew melon/grey ones, but they were out of stock so I got vanilla/candy violet. So pretty; I am seriously in lust with these things. They do everything they claim! Fun Factory has a new generation of Smart Balls out called the Smart Balls Teneo Duo; I love the ones I bought so much I might get those ones too. Anyway, check out the full review at the Vibrator G Spot!

June 25, 2009 at 9:52 am Leave a comment

G Spot Sex Toys: They’re Good for the Soul

copperI don’t really spend a lot of money on myself; I tend to tell myself I don’t need things. However, there’s two major exceptions to that rule. One, Books. I buy so many books. I turned our guest bedroom into a library, and I have stacks of books tucked into niches and corners all over my house. It’s an addiction, I admit.

The other exception is sex toys. Actually, pretty much anything sex related. Lingerie, costumes, accessories, sex toys, wine to ply my man with. I just spent over two hundred dollars at Eden Fantasys. And yes, I am cringing as I write that. That’s a lot of money for me, but I justified it by saying that stupendous orgasms are worth every penny. I bought the Total Ecstasy Triple Stimulator, which’ll be my first triple stimulator. It looks a little scary, like a cactus. And I got the Smart Balls by Fun Factory. I love Fun Factory, they make such good quality sex toys, and they always get the job done. Also got the Clit Brush Cock Ring. And, this was the big purchase: I bought a We-Vibe. I keep hearing about it, and it’s such a cool idea (you wear in during sex for clitoral and g spot stimulation) that I forked over the cash for it. God I hope it’s good; I will definitely be reviewing it here and at the Vibrator G Spot.

Shipment will be here tomorrow. I am so excited! I’m gonna tear that box open like it’s Christmas morning and I know I’m getting a, well, sex toy.

June 23, 2009 at 6:24 pm Leave a comment

How To: The G Spot … Updates Baby, Updates!

GSPOTOh, exciting day! Just submitted an article to ezinearticles.com; it should be up in a few days, I’ll make a post when it goes up.

Got How To: Find Your G Spot all shiny and eager, just have to post it. It’s coming!

Two reviews at Vibrator G Spot: the Paul and Paulina and the Gigi. Two vibes that’ll have you screaming someone’s name in vain! Another review’ll be going up later today. Oh, and I got the guestbook up and running, so if you stop by drop me a note, I’d love to hear from you.

So, it looks like everything’s out of the starting gate. I’m pretty happy with how things are looking now, but it’s inevitable that some stuff is gonna change. For example, the main site may move over to it’s own domain pretty soon, depending on my level of tolerance for weebly. So far so good, but damn is that interface frustrating, and I don’t really intend to keep How To: The G Spot on their domain anyways. Needs it’s own space, I think. We’ll see how things go, for now.

June 23, 2009 at 11:41 am Leave a comment


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